Stress Center Peer Support

Hi every one,
So here is the deal I am convert to a religion about 8 years ago and everything has been great. I fell in love with this religion and found peace. I felt like I found God. I have a very nice husband of two years and three beautiful boys (had twins)! For a while now I was part of an online group for new sisters on FB to help me learn and have a place to turn to because it is important to feel connected. One of the sisters asked a question to all of us about what we think the best qualities of our husband is. At first I didn't feel affected. I put down an answer and several others sisters answered too. Than one sister wrote like two paragraphs about her husband and how he was a "pretty man" and went on and on. Now my husband is handsome and very nice too, but it kind of bothered me because it seemed almost like a competiton at that point to show the world why they had the best husband. Maybe I interpreted this the wrong way, but I couldn't help it, I felt a terrible feeling in my stomache and the anxiety set in. What makes things worse is that I went to this sister's page and saw pictures of her alone and with her husband and they were so beautiful together and too many people were making comments about how beautiful she was how gorgeous she was etc., how they are the cutest couple ever in the teligion I am in, how they will have beautiful children etc. I know envy is a bad thing and I am trying to deal with it because I love God, but I started to feel so bad about myself and my relationship. Don't get me wrong everything with my husband is great except for the fact he works all the time so I hardly every see him because ( he has four mouths to feed!) But we don't have too many photos together because of his work schedule and the few we do have I don't recall being as nice as hers. I now feel like the prettiness I though I had is nothing. I feel like nothing. I know this sister is probably not trying to hurt others, but in her pictures she is covered modestly, but looking like a model the way she is posed. etc. I don't feel too pretty compared to her. even in this religious setting it seemd like people are hung up on looks. How cam I feel good about mysef and love myself the way that I am? Whay's worse is that I made a comment to the group that "God knows how happy I am with my husband and I don't need to brag." I was just so hurt and almost felt like having an anxiety attack. The sister who asked the question took great offense and went off on me.I expressed I was sorry and that my feelings were hurt and she still went on.

I think this program can really help you with those feelings of low self esteem. It is something those of us with anxiety and depression really struggle with. I know I do. I still have a long way to go but at least Im doing a bit better and Im starting to see a difference. Dont give up and youll start to see a positive difference. Good luck.

Hello there!

I read your post! Dang gurl! You didn't say anything wrong. That lady was way out of line. What kind of person asks about another woman's husband anyway? Don't you dare feel down or guilty or inferior. You seem like a very nice person. Get out of that group first of all. I am a very religious person. I was born and raised in a good Christian home. I am married to a wonderful man for 35 years and neither of us are good looking. But inside we are.
Write back to me. I am very worried about you! I don't know you but I do know that what you said is not making you happy. I lived with guilt and insecurity for years. I went through Lucinda Basset's program twice and enjoy the forums and mini chat. No one on here has ever been mean. Everyone uplifts each other and encourages us. You stay here.
Write back to me....okay?
Lucy Knepp
from Pittsburgh Pennsylvania