I am depressed for several reasons. First of all, I am 61 and not married and had a friend that I considered a boyfriend who is come back in a funny way to ask for me to pay for his expenses that I was supposed to pay for his return from Portland and he was abusive to me emotionally and I just left or abandoned him there. Not sure if I should pay him or not. He now wants to help me get back there financially though I have no idea why and when I asked him he said not to piss him off by asking why. So I dropped it. I don't know if he still cares or not. Neither do I think I will ever have another relationship meaning a good one this time and if I will ever be able to take care of myself financially( I am on disability and my son is autistic and living with me) My ex got out of paying for both my disabled son and for my car as well as other expenses. I am trying to work as a caregiver but have a lot of challenge in that kind of job with the anxiety and depression. In fact, I just started listening to the video and CD's my daughter lent me. I am at a loss as to what to do. I cannot afford to take off more work but as it is direct care, I feel incapable of working at this job. There are no other jobs in the area currently. Northern Az has so few jobs. I am overqualified but it has been 30 years since I worked for real except for a few odd jobs here and there. Sorry this is so long but if someone has any feedback I would appreciate it.
Martha
Depressed
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SilverLining
- Posts: 65
- Joined: Mon Oct 18, 2010 9:42 am
Hi Martha,
Your boyfriend doesn't sound like a very caring person and your relationship to him could turn abusive if it is not already. Verbal abuse is just as wrong as physical abuse. And if you are already struggling financially, why would you pay him back? Maybe I'm old school, but I think the man in a relationship should woo the lady. If he is already behaving this way, it will only get worse, if you allow it.
And at 61 years old, you still have plenty of time to find a nice gentleman. If it doesn't happen, then it is better to have peace and be alone that be with someone and be unhappy.
Hope you make the right choices for you. God bless.
Your boyfriend doesn't sound like a very caring person and your relationship to him could turn abusive if it is not already. Verbal abuse is just as wrong as physical abuse. And if you are already struggling financially, why would you pay him back? Maybe I'm old school, but I think the man in a relationship should woo the lady. If he is already behaving this way, it will only get worse, if you allow it.
And at 61 years old, you still have plenty of time to find a nice gentleman. If it doesn't happen, then it is better to have peace and be alone that be with someone and be unhappy.
Hope you make the right choices for you. God bless.
Peace I leave with you. My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.
Hi Martha, you're friend/boyfriend kind of sounds like a jerk. I'm sure there is a lot more to to him than just this story, but just be careful in how you let someone, who supposedly loves you, treat you! I know, I was married to a very abusive man years ago and it's easy to make excuses for them so before you know it, you wake up one day and can't believe you've allowed it to get so bad! He beat me down emotionally so much I guess he had decided for himself it would now be ok to hit me physically. He was very wrong! I packed my things and was gone and never looked back! I was lucky...many women don't get away. When two people care about 1 another, they don't talk to each other badly. Emotional abuse is just as bad as physical and it causes a lot of scarring you can't mend in a relationship. You may seem alone, but everyone has felt alone in their lifetime. I'm married, and I sometimes still feel alone. No amount of loneliness is worth being treated poorly.
I too have suffered from depression my whole life and recently it's been very bad for me. I've always heard the saying, "one day at a time", but can't seem to remember that when I start allowing all the worry to take over my brain. Recently, I have decided, 1 day at a time is all I can handle and when ever I start to get sad I tell myself this: "Today is all I have to focus on...I have two choices...have a good day or a bad day" And when I think of it like that I know I am strong enough to conquer 1 day and I make myself...force myself to have a good day. And then the next day I start all over again. I don't know if that makes sense, but it's been very helpful for me lately. Hang in there! Good luck!
I too have suffered from depression my whole life and recently it's been very bad for me. I've always heard the saying, "one day at a time", but can't seem to remember that when I start allowing all the worry to take over my brain. Recently, I have decided, 1 day at a time is all I can handle and when ever I start to get sad I tell myself this: "Today is all I have to focus on...I have two choices...have a good day or a bad day" And when I think of it like that I know I am strong enough to conquer 1 day and I make myself...force myself to have a good day. And then the next day I start all over again. I don't know if that makes sense, but it's been very helpful for me lately. Hang in there! Good luck!
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Paisleegreen
- Posts: 1778
- Joined: Mon Oct 25, 2010 5:27 pm
Paislee