Where do I belong?

whereIblong · Post by **whereIblong** » Tue Sep 23, 2008 4:35 pm

I am 22 and I have always felt like the black sheep of the family. I've been struggling with this literally since I can remember. I don't know if my family truly loves me. What am I hear for? I am thinking about cutting everyone off completely and leaving this whole life behind. I know I can do good things and I won't have anyone to keep me from doing them. But if I do this it can hurt my mom's future, and even though she is practically killing me (not physically), I still care for her regardless of whatever love she might or might not have for me. Till next time.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Tue Sep 23, 2008 5:23 pm

Sometimes it does seem like the best solution is to just run away but it usualy does not work because one carries the problems inside themselves. so one must face them again just in a different setting. Have you started this program? Maybe it will help sort some of your feelings out.I hate to see one so young hurting so.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Tue Sep 23, 2008 5:59 pm

ooh, i can really relate to this. ok, not word for word. . . but the pain of feeling punished for being myself amongst my own family is something that i have felt many times.

if you have the program. the skills will really help you define your problems more clearly (the truth may be more surprising than you think) and you will learn to take steps toward that positive future.

i wish you the best!

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Mon Oct 06, 2008 9:45 am

I know exactly how you feel. I'm 38 now but when i was around your age it was getting to point i couldn't take it and i did take off. Let me tell you the lesson i learned before you do anything drastic. It didn't work. I went across the country and all i reallized is I was running from myself and you just can't run from yourself. I might always feel like the black sheep of my family but as i get older i care less and less what they think. All that matters is what you think about yourself. I forget the quote but it goes something like this..."if i try and please everyone and the only one left unhappy will be me." Maybe we were born into the wrong family... but the thing is you do belong and i'm sure they do love you. But when they get to you too much say #$^#$& them! And I don't mean in a angry way i mean really no big deal #$#^%$ kind of way. Like PLEASE who are they??? What the heck do they know anyway. You won't like them too much if they make you feel bad about yourself anyway so if you want to love them your going to have to take away the power they have over you...then you'll be free to love and be loved. btw i'm still working on it.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Tue Oct 21, 2008 5:01 pm

I bet most of us could say that we felt "different" from those around us. I think it goes with the territory, so to speak. I can relate....and I'm 52 years old. I still feel like the blacksheep....but it's OK. You can put yourself in a position to call the shots....own your own business, choose your own friends.....own your own mind, body & soul. I bet you are really creative....and people sometimes feel very threatened by what or who they don't understand. Bravo....that you're unique and not a cookie cutter person afraid to think for herself. Just hang in there....and when you're older, you'll learn to appreciate whatever good qualities you family members have.....and you'll find a way to love them unconditionally. I'm sure they love you....but as I said, they may feel threatened or confused by your uniqueness.
I wish you the best.