Daughter Leaving Home

kelly123 · Post by **kelly123** » Mon Sep 01, 2008 6:58 am

I am a father of two daughters who completed the course three months ago and have had some of the most wonderful days of my life since going back to work and living each moment in joy and happiness.When I started the course I,was in pretty rough shape.The first day I never would have believed I,could change the way I think and become happy again.Today was a real test for me as I said good-bye to my oldest daughter who is moving away to college.I have never been good at good-byes and am feeling very blue.Does anyone out there who has been through this have any advice on moving beyond the heartache of letting a child go into the world to discover all that it has to offer.Signed a dad with puffy red eyes.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Mon Sep 01, 2008 7:20 am

Hello Kelly:
Oh boy! Do I remember this time in my life!!
I know that empty feeling!!
I don't have any advice. But I can tell you that time eases the emptiness. You somehow adjust to the transition.
You will be so proud of your daughter's independance and her progress!!
Each time you get to see her you will marvel at her growth and her own adjustments.
Life is just full of these changes.
My sympathies are with you. I have been there 3 times.
Bless you!
MaryJane

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Mon Sep 01, 2008 7:25 am

Hi Kelly123, I know how you're feeling. I had three children go off to college. They are now adults (ages 32, 29, and 25). The oldest two are married with children of their own and the youngest just finished grad school.

Your post made me think back to the day each of them left for college. I thought I'd lose them forever! It felt like someone had cut off one of my limbs and I was going to have to go on with a large part of me missing forever. BUT, that's not true. Right now you are feeling like their new experiences will keep them from you. You probably think you will not be in their world anymore. Nothing is farther from the truth. You will ALWAYS be their world! They always will be in your life. Yes, it will change from year to year because of the changes they will go through, but it's all good stuff and you will grow with each new situation. Just as you watched them go off to kindergarten and then grow to be young adults, you will watch them become great human beings who will head out into this world and accomplish great things...because you have given them the security they needed to do this.

It's so normal to feel blue at this moment, but it will be short lived as you settle into your new circumstances and discover they are never farther away than a phone call!

They are young for a short time, but they are part of our lives forever. Believe me, it only gets better and better.

Warm regards, Donna

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Mon Sep 01, 2008 7:34 am

What a great dad you must be!
Just wanted to let you know that. Your daughter is on her big journey now, but guess what, she will always need your great sage advice. Dads are not replaceable. To a daughter, no matter how old, no matter the question, Dad knows best! (Mine is gone now, but I speak from true heart).

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Mon Sep 01, 2008 7:49 am

Thank-you all for your replies and reminding me of how lucky I am.As you can see from other posts there are a lot of people far worse off and prayers to all the people of New Orleans that their family members and homes remain safe and they can get their lives back as soon as possible.

Christine1977 · Post by **Christine1977** » Wed Sep 03, 2008 7:59 am

Letters. Write letters. I know we are in the age of digital and elctronic everything, but there is just something cathartic and powerful about the written word....I write my son in Atlanta all the time since he moved a year ago and wondered if it really mattered...then I went for my first visit and found my cards and letters (some of them) stuck to his bulletin board in his bedroom....and it made me feel great.....so....I promise you it will help you AND mean something to them...have done the same thing with my daughter who moved away some time ago...but has since moved back home...and she talks to me about how much it meant to her....I am one of those dad's, like you, that is totally enmeshed with my kids....I openly admit it and would not have it any other way...

Hang in there....
JChick

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Wed Sep 03, 2008 8:09 am

jchick,
Yes!! Letters are wonderful. We have again moved 2500 miles away and my mom had helped us pack and had written coloring books and cookbooks on one of the boxes (on paper and put it on the box). I kept it so I could see her handwriting! I also kept her letters before when we had moved. You are right, there is something about real letters and seeing their handwriting on it.

take care,
Ocean

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Wed Sep 03, 2008 8:24 am

Thanks for the suggestion.Now that I think about it anytime I have gotten a letter it has been special.