I have been doing this program for a while now i have been stuck on session four. i am having a hard time getting motivated to do anything. i feel like it is so hard to listen to everything i have to when in the beginning i thought there wasn't enough and it needed to go by faster. i am a senior this year and graduate june 13th. I am behind on school and have trouble being around students at my school. I have been depressed for about 5 years now and i have recently discovered with this program that my anxiety is extremly high. I have gone to many different doctors from family therapists to phychatrists. I was mis diagnosed with bi polar disorder and was taking medication for it. I was on lithium, lamotragine, wellbutrin, abilify, zoloft and one more that is hard to say. Every single one made everything worse, i got to the point where life was just painful and i would go weeks without smiling. I am unable to hold a job and i dont have to many friends. People say i just have that look that says im a bitch but i dont want people to be scared to talk to me. i really am a good person and i put others before myself.
My grandpa died at 2:00 this morning and i am just a mess. I have had no luck with getting replys before but please if anyone reads this im calling for help. i dont know what else to do. my life is deterorating before me and i cant get a grip.
- Courtney
Anyone please...
Re: Anyone please...
Hi Courtney,
I am sorry for the loss of your grandfather. It is always hard when we lose someone we love. Don't give up on yourself.
It is good that you have the courage to acknowledge that you are not feeling good and have sought help. It is not uncommon for people to have tried many medications that haven't quite worked, just don't give up if it is something you may need for now. Keep checking in with your doctor, and if you do not feel comfortable with the one you have, don't be afraid to get a second opinion. Excercising regularty and eating a healthy diet can go a long way in helping also.
I am much older now but when I turned about 15 I started feeling really uncomfortable in social situations and always felt I didn't quite fit in with my peers. A lot of this was internal, as others say they would have never have guessed this. Some of this was a normal part of being a teenager but it progressed to the extreme of not going out to normal activities, avoiding large groups/parties, sitting by myself in a quieter school caf, rather than in the busy, more lively section. I wanted the focus off of me/more comfortable being invisible. I never asked for help then, I dont think I quite knew that this was not a normal way to feel. I did myself a great diservice by not talking to someone then. So kudos to you for seeking help and speaking out!
Keep going through the program it has so much to offer- I wish I found it sooner. It's a big year for you with graduation- talk about stress and pressure! The best advice I can give you is for you to put yourself first, love yourself, respect yourself, and set some small goals for yourself that will put you in the direction you want to be in. Perhaps you can connect with a guidance counselor at school who can assist you with some support so you can get back on track with your studies. Also instead of a paying job, volunteer work in an area of something you are interested in may be something you might want to consider. Not a lot of pressure and its a good way to connect with others who share a similar interest. Not sure where you are located but if you google voluteer work and your location you may find something.
Maybe those other students are just not for you- or maybe they are- just be careful not to cheat yourself by trying to fit in. I wish I had been truer to myself when I was your age. That's why session 4 is great- who cares what they think anyways?? (As long as we are not hurting anyone) It's not so easy to smile on the outside when we feel sad inside- but maybe a small goal could be to smile and say hi to one person in one class per day?
Don't give up!!! You can do this! Use your CD's for encouragement and dont feel like you have to move thru them quickly, take it one day at a time and set up some small goals. When I get discouraged I take a look at what I have done and try not to focus on what I didn't get done.
Give yourself credit for getting up and going to school each day. Build on the positives. Hope this helps. I'll be pulling for you as we go through the program together......
I am sorry for the loss of your grandfather. It is always hard when we lose someone we love. Don't give up on yourself.
It is good that you have the courage to acknowledge that you are not feeling good and have sought help. It is not uncommon for people to have tried many medications that haven't quite worked, just don't give up if it is something you may need for now. Keep checking in with your doctor, and if you do not feel comfortable with the one you have, don't be afraid to get a second opinion. Excercising regularty and eating a healthy diet can go a long way in helping also.
I am much older now but when I turned about 15 I started feeling really uncomfortable in social situations and always felt I didn't quite fit in with my peers. A lot of this was internal, as others say they would have never have guessed this. Some of this was a normal part of being a teenager but it progressed to the extreme of not going out to normal activities, avoiding large groups/parties, sitting by myself in a quieter school caf, rather than in the busy, more lively section. I wanted the focus off of me/more comfortable being invisible. I never asked for help then, I dont think I quite knew that this was not a normal way to feel. I did myself a great diservice by not talking to someone then. So kudos to you for seeking help and speaking out!
Keep going through the program it has so much to offer- I wish I found it sooner. It's a big year for you with graduation- talk about stress and pressure! The best advice I can give you is for you to put yourself first, love yourself, respect yourself, and set some small goals for yourself that will put you in the direction you want to be in. Perhaps you can connect with a guidance counselor at school who can assist you with some support so you can get back on track with your studies. Also instead of a paying job, volunteer work in an area of something you are interested in may be something you might want to consider. Not a lot of pressure and its a good way to connect with others who share a similar interest. Not sure where you are located but if you google voluteer work and your location you may find something.
Maybe those other students are just not for you- or maybe they are- just be careful not to cheat yourself by trying to fit in. I wish I had been truer to myself when I was your age. That's why session 4 is great- who cares what they think anyways?? (As long as we are not hurting anyone) It's not so easy to smile on the outside when we feel sad inside- but maybe a small goal could be to smile and say hi to one person in one class per day?
Don't give up!!! You can do this! Use your CD's for encouragement and dont feel like you have to move thru them quickly, take it one day at a time and set up some small goals. When I get discouraged I take a look at what I have done and try not to focus on what I didn't get done.
Give yourself credit for getting up and going to school each day. Build on the positives. Hope this helps. I'll be pulling for you as we go through the program together......
Re: Anyone please...
I am also Bipolar and have tried many different medications. I finally found one that works pretty well. I am on Geodon. It has very few side effects. The only side effect I have really noticed is I have to take it at night because it makes me un functionally sleepy. When I first started taking it I had to sleep anywhere from 10 to 14 hours a day. But now I can get by with 9 to 11 hours of sleep. But once you wake up you are really awake. There is no taking any naps. You just don’t sleep until you take the medication again. Geodon didn’t change any of my bad habits. I still have to train my mind daily to think positive. Also I had to learn to talk to myself in a loving accepting supporting manner. The only thing the medication does is help stabilize my severe mood swings. Since I started taking it I have managed to stay out of the hospital for severe depression. I have to say the program has really helped a lot, too. Maybe you can talk to your ddoctor about trying Geodon.
Something else that I like to do is record positive affirmations on my cell phone and listen to them every day. I recommend that you read the book “What to say when you talk to yourself” It has a lot of good self talk examples and I recorded myself saying them on my cell phone. I got a copy of the book for about $5 on ebay which included the shipping.
Sometimes if I feel unmotivated I tell myself that I am capable of accomplishing any task I decide to do. I also say things like I will have it done in no time. The hardest part is starting. Once begun is half done.
If you are having trouble getting past session 4 just move on and come back to it later. I actually got stuck on session 4 also. Just give yourself a lot of praise for even the smallest thing that you accomplish. It really does help.
I also feel insecure in social settings. I find it is much easier for me to talk to someone one on one than it is to fit in a group. I am sure that there is someone in your school who is having the same kind of difficulties you are having. Place an ad on a bulletin board asking for someone who is looking for support for anxiety. Start a group and teach people what you are learning from the program. That is what I did. It caused a lot of stress to keep up with, but I discovered it was helping others as well as myself. I discovered I was not the only one. Even if just one person contacts you, then maybe you can become friends and you won’t have to worry about being alone at school.
Something else that I like to do is record positive affirmations on my cell phone and listen to them every day. I recommend that you read the book “What to say when you talk to yourself” It has a lot of good self talk examples and I recorded myself saying them on my cell phone. I got a copy of the book for about $5 on ebay which included the shipping.
Sometimes if I feel unmotivated I tell myself that I am capable of accomplishing any task I decide to do. I also say things like I will have it done in no time. The hardest part is starting. Once begun is half done.
If you are having trouble getting past session 4 just move on and come back to it later. I actually got stuck on session 4 also. Just give yourself a lot of praise for even the smallest thing that you accomplish. It really does help.
I also feel insecure in social settings. I find it is much easier for me to talk to someone one on one than it is to fit in a group. I am sure that there is someone in your school who is having the same kind of difficulties you are having. Place an ad on a bulletin board asking for someone who is looking for support for anxiety. Start a group and teach people what you are learning from the program. That is what I did. It caused a lot of stress to keep up with, but I discovered it was helping others as well as myself. I discovered I was not the only one. Even if just one person contacts you, then maybe you can become friends and you won’t have to worry about being alone at school.
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praying4sun
- Posts: 23
- Joined: Mon Jan 31, 2011 1:23 am
Re: Anyone please...
Courtney.... why we let ourselves get so wrapped up in a dark and lonely world who knows, it does not feel good. Whatever happens do not give up. I am sorry for your loss, I think that pain makes you more vulnuarble to relapsing into your old habits...remember you are grieving a loss and its only normal for your emotions to be out of whack... don't give up and allow the negative feelings take over mama. Your not alone (((hugs))) to you.