Needing Patience

[HopefulDreams]

Dear All,

I severely need patience. I take the medication as prescribed but feel severe numbness in my frontal lobes as well as a heavy pain on my chest. I love my husband deep down, but I know how my illness is destroying us and the beauty of what we were. I hate my psychiatrist who perscribed me medicine (have since found a new one).. because I simply had severe panic and she prescribed something else (I will not say what on the forum). I want this pain to go away.. I want to love my husband the way I always did.. I want to love my family the way I always did, I want to scoop up my niece in my arms and make her laugh the way I used to.. I want to be me!! HELP! I've been hospitalized for severe depression and have been getting treatment for 1 and 1/2 months. Please let this pass.. I feel like I have world on my shoulders ,.but I so desperately want to live in the present moment the way I did some time ago before the shrik messed me up asking about the past. Anyone else feel the same?

[Paisleegreen]

Wow, I'm not sure how to answer this. Why are you afraid to tell us what medicine you are on. I've been on some AD's.
Have you had a tragic past? Paislee

[Krystie75]

It is important to accept your past. Forgive yourself and anyone else who has hurt you. Tell yourself wonderful things like you are peaceful, lovabale and thankful. Say it exactly like this I am feeling inner peace. Even if you really arn't say it to yourself over and over as many wonderful things as you can think of. You may not believe it but just keep saying it. It will help. Tell yourself how special you are using I am statements.

[Cthebeauty03]

i can relate to you in many ways. i have tried so many medications and doctors, phycs, herbal doctors.. nothing worked, i was mis diagnosed with bi polar disorder and was given all the meds for it. it made me ten times worse. i would sit there and scream as i rocked myself to sleep everynight, i have put so much on my family and i have lost all of my friends. i gave up on life and i did not know how to be happy anymore. i feel i have lost myself and i am far to deep to climb out of this sadness i feel. feeling numb became normal and crying came everyday, i would be lucky if i did not get upset that day. i have lost the will to live i have lost myself. my friend got me this program and i am week 4. at first i was so excited and i had so much hope but as time went on i figured it would just fix itself. it keeps getting harder for me to face my fears and i feel so alone...

i try to go on here more but i do not get any feedback, please tell me we can connect and talk more, i would love to have a friend at this hard time and i have this feeling you are a good soul..
- your friend courtney

[TheTimeIsNow]

HopefulDreams and Courtney, You're NOT alone! We're all here for the same reason as you. We've all suffered from panic, anxiety and depression. Many of us think that we are the worst case out there and can't be helped. I felt that way. I thought the people that got help were not as bad as me. They weren't in a deep depression like me. They didn't have crazy scary thoughts like me. Well guess what? As bad as I was, I'm getting better. And I'm 35 yrs old and have been through this most of my life. But nothing has helped me like this program has. I've tried meds prescribed to me by psychiatrist, obgyn, and my regular doctor. They only made me feel worse. I kind of had a spacey feeling with them and that made me feel even more crazy. Now I'm not on any meds at all. And now the world feels real again. I know what it's like to feel the weight of the world on your shoulders. That's why I'm here. But I keep going even when I feel anxiety or depression. There's no time like the present to start. Just keep going. Like Lucinda says in one of the videos, Don't wait until you've perfected each session to get to the next one. Just keep going through the program week by week. You'll get it. We all will.
Good luck!

[westlynne56]

It sounds as if you both feel you have a lot to live for, a lot to be grateful for. Concentrate on that, find one more thng everyday to be grateful for, even if it's as trivial as being thankful for the air you breathe. Know...no...believe there's a light at the end of the tunnel.

You aren't alone; we're all scared. That's why we're here.

Take small steps, stick with the program and do everything it says. I know it's hard but keep blocking and replacing those terrible thoughts. I can't believe what a difference its made with me. I'm also taking and anti-depressent, Cipralex, and have no allusion that it alone is going to "cure" me. This program, councelling and making myself get out will do that.

Hang in there, take one moment at a time and focus on that one little spark of hope that must be inside you, otherwise you wouldn't be here asking for help.

All the best.

Lynne