Greetings -- I need to make a decision. I have only been in the program four weeks. The parish in the town next to mine is running a trip to Scandinavia. I have mixed feelings about it, mostly about fitting in with the crowd -- I am single. I know that half the parish is of another nationality, that most of the people already signed up are couples, and that the few singles are probably close friends or related, and I know next to noone in this parish. There is a good chance that I will be the odd person, especially in that I am not a party type and don't drink (in AA). Furthermore, the trip does three capital cities for the most part with some country bus trips inbetween. Most of the time in the cities is free time where I am supposed to do what I want.
I frankly feel very uncomfortable with this trip and would rather take a cruise where I am much more in control of what I do. But I feel guilty about not doing what the program recommends. Yet I don't have the skills, yet.
I feel that I am too early in the program to be taking this kind of trip and I am definitely not a social butterfly. I know that this sounds like a lot of negatives, but I know myself.
The trip will cost me about $500.00 per night plus certain expenses.
Any suggestions?
WW
Should I or Should I Not? HELP!!!!!!
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Guest
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Guest
I believe that travel is better than therapy! If you don't feel comfortable going on this PARTICULAR trip, then commit to yourself that you will take a comparable trip, just YOU, or yourself and a friend or two. I ENJOY my alone time; it's a very special quality to appreciate solace. That's definitely a side effect of anx/dep, that everyone should emulate!! good luck
h.t.
h.t.
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Guest
WW
I agree trips are a great way to start again to enjoy your life, but do take a trip you think you will get something out of for yourself. Ask yourself what you enjoy doing - walking, photography, sitting by the water? Then arrange a trip with other singles, or just a friend and do that trip. When you find that you have made it through OK, then you will be ready to try something a little different. And you really don't need to be afraid of being a single with a lot of couples. I have been alone now for 10 years, and any party I go to -albeit reluctantly, I find plenty of people who are interesting to talk to and learn from. Unless you are actively seeking a relationship and "mostly couples" event is a very safe place to be. Most couples bend over backward to include you because they don't want you to feel left out. Just be yourself and relax and you will be surprised at what a nice time you might have.
Hope this helps. I 'm just new to this program as well, but I already feel so much better, I really can't believe it.
I agree trips are a great way to start again to enjoy your life, but do take a trip you think you will get something out of for yourself. Ask yourself what you enjoy doing - walking, photography, sitting by the water? Then arrange a trip with other singles, or just a friend and do that trip. When you find that you have made it through OK, then you will be ready to try something a little different. And you really don't need to be afraid of being a single with a lot of couples. I have been alone now for 10 years, and any party I go to -albeit reluctantly, I find plenty of people who are interesting to talk to and learn from. Unless you are actively seeking a relationship and "mostly couples" event is a very safe place to be. Most couples bend over backward to include you because they don't want you to feel left out. Just be yourself and relax and you will be surprised at what a nice time you might have.
Hope this helps. I 'm just new to this program as well, but I already feel so much better, I really can't believe it.