Stress Center Peer Support

Does anyone have any insight on how to do this? I can't always grab my pad and pen, but I tend to "forget" what the thoughts were when I am able to write. Do you also immediately write down a postive spin on the thought or do you do it later? Help!

Sometimes I also feel like my negative thoughts are contrived...does anyone else feel this way? Like I'm purposely having them to have something to write down at times. Trust me, I have enough involuntarily, but still.

Lol that sounds very familiar. I've been replacing thoughts for years so I could prolly help you out with this one.

It isn't reasonable to expect you to write down every single negative thought and thats ok...after some time you'll be able to do it in your head but that could take time so don't expect it right away.

I tend to forget thoughts just as i'm writing them down too. Not as much now as i did in the past. This is when you start to question how you feel. Good or bad? Ok you figure you feel bad. Usually there is some kinda theme there and involving the same things. So are you feeling worried? Angry?

One of the things i read in Dr.Burn's books is a technique to figure out thoughts. You draw a stick figure and a bubble. In that bubble write down any negative thoughts that you'd think this person would have (oh and the stick figure has to have a sad face). Those are usually your thoughts.

Also some of these thoughts might feel fake. Its like, am i really feeling this way or am I just making it up? That would be the numb feeling that comes with having high levels of anxiety. Don't worry so much about that, fake or not you are getting practice.

As for replacing the thoughts. The key is not to make yourself feel better. Rather it is to expose the lie in the way you are thinking and yes i know that isn't always easy. You can ask yourself how likely is X going to happen? Has it happened to other people? Will it matter in 10 years? You might need some help with replacing for the first little while and you can definately ask people what they think. People on here are a great resource for that and I like the practice myself. If you'd like I could show you some examples of my own thoughts and the replacements for them, would that be something you'd want?


Hope this helps,

Mike

I cannot write down these thoughts either. Too time consuming and a hindrance. I remember only by WHAT information they contain. Most of my thoughts are of the same color. I can write them down easily and remember them easily...because I keep rehashing them in my mind constantly!!!!!! Like a broken record, I dont need extra work really in my life now. I am working on simplifying my life as much as I can. I would love to eliminate TV altogether too for its becoming more of a stress finding something decent on. I eliminate things that cause stress/depression...slowly but surely...this plan works best for me and the tapes of course which are pretty good are rooting for me and keeping me above water..... creamcheese

In my 20-minute drive to work yesterday (at stoplights), I wrote down thirteen negative thoughts that came to me. Did not realize how much I think that way, because much of it is not on a completely conscious level.

Today, I had a realization as well. Had not realized how much i "what if," because I don't use those words (consciously). I think mostly in pictures, I guess. So now every time I think about a future day or event in a negative way, I put up the STOP sign, breathe (2-4) and tell myself to relax and be in the present moment. It's working pretty well, so far. "The will of God will never take you where the grace of God will not protect you."

Wow you could write so many while driving? How can you do that?

Thats a great realization. The stop sign is a great technique to work and if you can keep at it, you will reap great rewards. I think its very inspiring and hey I think i'm going to do that too. Thank you.


Mike

Very cool, Kathie C. Thank you for sharing that insight. I have a lot of negative... somethings... that I have trouble grabbing hold of. Also often nonverbal. Or worse, the unconscious assumption that makes the thought make sense. If that made sense.

HELP!!! I am feeling extremely stressed/anxious right now and can't seem to positive talk my way through it....
I am attending a conference alone....which i'm finding very weird feeling- i usually am fine...but feeling real alone and skiddish...and anxious...and blue

i have been approached about making a job change...and they are wanting lots of information about budget etc. to start up the new "job," not sure if i want to take it...can't calm all my feelings down....wanting to just run...

usually love being "away..."and for the first time i'm feeling such a panic to get "home,"

my husband is coming tonight...but wanting to stop and eat first at his favorite place before he comes here and then will go sit with me somewhere to eat....feeling rejected and crazy writing this....don't know how to find that peaceful place...i have been in this high level of anxiousness for two days now...so it just keeps escalating! ideas?

forgot to say...i am trying to write down (during the conference- ha) my negative thoughts...but not coming up with replacements...

TTT - could it just be excitement and general keyed-uppedness, at the conference, and with the new job opportunity? I get pretty keyed up when "away". A relaxation mp3 or two might help you feel more at "home" where you are. And a little exercise to burn off adrenaline.

My usual trick when I'm overkeyed in a crowd, is to just try to stop thinking about myself, by projecting myself out towards other people. Like rather than try to argue with a negative thought, try to immediately switch to a positive thought about someone in the throng. "He's well prepared to speak", "I like that vendor display", "She looks like she's having a full-body sensual experience with that ice cream she's eating." Whatever.

Dunno if that helps any.

Gisette that idea about focusing on other people is a great way to handle situations like that. Keep in mind you would not be the only person to feel that anxiety in a situation like that. I can't remember where i heard this but we all have one thing in common and that is pain. We can connect with everybody through pain via empathy. Deep down nobody is going to fault you for being anxious as they have experienced this themselves.

There is one thing i just started to say in response to someone else's negative comment and perhaps you may find it useful too. What i say if someone is making a negative comment regarding anything about me is, You're the one thinking like that so its your problem. I don't have to go along with it and make it my problem too.

One more thing...take it to the worst case and no i don't mean you embarass yourself and then someone pulls your pants down and a giant meteor hurls down into the building and kills everybody. You have a job already so if this doesn't turn back you are still fine financially, people might think you're an aweful person and then they waste their time making themselves feel bad with those kinds of thoughts...etc.


Mike