Question about positive talk

[Mary B.]

Hi Coach Chris & fellow members,
I am on session 3 and wanted to ask if anyone else is having a hard time coming up with a believable "positive" when u wake up feeling furthest from well. And so the day goes. I'am trying not to obsesses over what, why and when it will be consistently better. But this 'in between' time of feeling horrible is hard to accept and difficult to find comforting self talk for. Let me give it a try; "ok so I know that I'm still feeling a significant degree of anxiety, panic, tired, shortness of breath, muscle tension and depression BUT it is ok bc this is to be expected as I am still in the early stages of recovery. I have to continue living along side all of this uncomfortableness associated with anxiety until I have completed the program and the time I need to fully recover". I guess that is believable but still feels hard to accept that all of my pain and suffering is being caused by little old me. I'm sorry for the negativity as I'm trying to be positive-lol just want to connect with others for support through this difficult time. Pls feel free to share, thanks
Maria

[Scylla]

Well, I have type 1 diabetes. It is sometimes hard to find that thought that will drag me out of bed each morning. For some reason I manage to find it though. I have hypothyroidism so often my first thought is I have to take the pill. Then I can go back to sleep. As far as my bipolar goes, I feel my last thought before I go to bed is important to frame my thoughts for the rest of the day. So in which case, conquering my anxiety involves conquering my thoughts all the time.

[Mary B.]

Hi Scylla,
Yes, I think that our thoughts are at the center of what we need to control. Sounds like you are practicing positive self talk which is great! And it's a good point to be aware of our late thoughts before falling asleep which may impact our sleep and morning after. Keep up the good work!

[munchkin51]

Dear Mary B.;
This is my second time going though the program. Just like the first time I am having a hard time with positive talk. I am able to see the nagative talk witch is good (the first time around I could not do that); but I am having a hard time beleveing in the good stuff. Know that I support you on your walk to recovery. We well get though this together.
Love and Peace,
Munchkin

[munchkin51]

Dear Mary B.,
I tried to send you a personal message but could not figure out how to send it. I was wondering if you would feel comfortable in sending me your e-mail address, so we could be each others support system.

Love and Peace,
Munchkin

[mtassinari]

Mary B,

I have also had many times when I had trouble thinking of positive replacements for my negative thoughts. Sometimes when I did come up with a replacement I found it hard to believe, as you describe. I think that just the act of writing down the negative thought and coming up with something more positive is moving you in the right direction.

I still have difficulty with the positive self talk during anxious or depressive times, but this is when it is most important to use it. I'm actually on session 13 but I find I still need to practice writing down the negative thoughts and replacements for them, it is tough to change the way you think but I believe it is totally worth it. Keep going, in time it will get better! : )


Munchkin,

It is also my second time going through the program, I am also starting to spot more negative thoughts this time around. I have found that once I have the negative thought down on paper, I can use the 3 "r-words" from the flash cards (is it reasonable, rational, and realistic) to help me take a truthful look at the thought.

Sometimes I resist doing this because it is difficult and feels unnatural, and sometimes it takes a couple tries to write a good replacement. But when I do take the time to restructure the thought I consistently feel better. Going to keep working at it!