I have been a negative thinker for as long as I can remember, but I remember when I was in 9th grade, I think, I thought, "If I talk negatively about myself, such as if I say that I'm really not that smart even though I got a an A on a test, people will think I am modest, and therefore they will like me." I remember getting a 94% on a hard Biology test in 10th grade, and I was crying because I wanted a 100%. My "positive" thought was, "At least I passed," but my teacher was saying, "What do you mean 'At least you passed.' You got an A!"
How ironic it is that people didn't like being around me for my negativity.
How my negative thinking started being "good" for me
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ElectrifiedBrain
- Posts: 38
- Joined: Tue Jul 12, 2011 5:50 pm
How my negative thinking started being "good" for me
"It is not because things are difficult that we do not dare; it is because we do not dare that things are difficult." - Unknown
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garyhermesch52
- Posts: 28
- Joined: Sat Jul 16, 2011 10:00 pm
Re: How my negative thinking started being "good" for me
Your post made me think of one time in high school around the 10th grade also, I think when I was taking a test and
I decided to intentionally put down the wrong answer to some questions so I wouldn't get too high of a score and girls
would think I was a nerd. I was eventually pretty successful at dumbing myself down. I was always a pretty gung-ho
type so I went on to study engineering in college. I went on to graduate in 5 years including summer school but just
as an indication of how it was, one semester my total grades consisted of 3Fs and a D. I was able to get a job after
college with help from my sister but my productively was extremely poor and usually I would sit there thinking about
how much I would rather be farming. Then I picked up a magazine in the back of church with an article on self-acceptance.
I had to keep reading it over and over but that eventually led me to get interested in religion and I have been ever since.
So now pretty much everything I do is motivated by my religious beliefs. Some would probably say I'm trying to earn my
way into heaven, but really I think its more just wanting to give something in return. I only work part of the time now
and I draw unemployment in between jobs but this is a lot more bearable than the way it was before when I was working
a desk job that I dreaded going to every day. I don't know if you were interested in any of this but I just thought I'd
throw it out there. Good luck.
I decided to intentionally put down the wrong answer to some questions so I wouldn't get too high of a score and girls
would think I was a nerd. I was eventually pretty successful at dumbing myself down. I was always a pretty gung-ho
type so I went on to study engineering in college. I went on to graduate in 5 years including summer school but just
as an indication of how it was, one semester my total grades consisted of 3Fs and a D. I was able to get a job after
college with help from my sister but my productively was extremely poor and usually I would sit there thinking about
how much I would rather be farming. Then I picked up a magazine in the back of church with an article on self-acceptance.
I had to keep reading it over and over but that eventually led me to get interested in religion and I have been ever since.
So now pretty much everything I do is motivated by my religious beliefs. Some would probably say I'm trying to earn my
way into heaven, but really I think its more just wanting to give something in return. I only work part of the time now
and I draw unemployment in between jobs but this is a lot more bearable than the way it was before when I was working
a desk job that I dreaded going to every day. I don't know if you were interested in any of this but I just thought I'd
throw it out there. Good luck.