I listened to my session 2 audio today. I like the sound of Dr. Fishers voice. I am beginning to see some new things that will be helpful. I think at times I do live in a state of general anxiety. Other times not so. It makes sense to me that things build slow and steady. Toss a little in today and a bit more the next day and have a big event blast you, and back to the drawing board. Panic attack, or not always a attack but always tight, stressed, avoiding because you can't take any more. I see...
Once again I have to get better at recognizing.
I won't post till later tomorrow as I have an early appt. I feel in control and have done a good job today.
Mike,
I hope I can learn it as good as tying my shoes or eating! LOL... One day...
It will be good practice for me, I am in control.
Hey no worries with past emails! I totally understand. I too get to stressed out reading other peoples journeys. I often feel like I want to help, but this in a very individual journey. It is easy because we all are very caring, sensitive people. We want to be polite, courteous and we do care. We can offer support, but it is very draining to get trapped on the phone, in a store or where ever we end up, with someone going on and on. I understand how my husband must feel after a long spell of me worrying about the tumor, or the fainting, or what ever. I actually laughed today listening to the tape with Dr. Fisher. It is NOT funny when your the one going through it. But it is funny when someone starts talking like that and you know because you have done it! We can over come this and we are working though this program, it shows we care and want to help ourselves.
Forever,
I like what Mike said. "Let the answers find you". They will because you are helping yourself and getting to know yourself better.
Like me when it comes to HA what do you fear? Is it something specific or just a general fear of sickness. It is hard to pin point. For me sometimes I just fear the unknown. Then I now recognize I am not living in the present moment. We will learn more as we go though this program. We are healthy!
Empowering Group Program Run-through Part2
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Ninjafrodo2
- Posts: 234
- Joined: Sat Oct 19, 2013 11:05 am
Re: Empowering Group Program Run-through Part2
THH
thank you for understanding! As for the anxiety it really does feel like we go right back to the drawing board when we are hit with a big whammy but in reality, we just had the experience and we were where we were before it and are just shaken up and maybe more doubtful of our abilities (if we did respond in the usual way of getting afraid and trying to push it away). It really doesn't take away from the experiences we had before or the knowledge either.
And its also interesting how your responses are now...I don't know if it's just me and that I'm feeling what is being said more, but it seems like you and everybody else is more open and genuine with what they are saying than in past run throughs. I don't know, what do you think?
Oh and by the way, one of the last run throughs, I used to imagine that you had conquered the anxiety completely and were all peaceful, pleasant and didn't have any generalized anxiety and I actually got a little jealous
Mike
thank you for understanding! As for the anxiety it really does feel like we go right back to the drawing board when we are hit with a big whammy but in reality, we just had the experience and we were where we were before it and are just shaken up and maybe more doubtful of our abilities (if we did respond in the usual way of getting afraid and trying to push it away). It really doesn't take away from the experiences we had before or the knowledge either.
And its also interesting how your responses are now...I don't know if it's just me and that I'm feeling what is being said more, but it seems like you and everybody else is more open and genuine with what they are saying than in past run throughs. I don't know, what do you think?
Oh and by the way, one of the last run throughs, I used to imagine that you had conquered the anxiety completely and were all peaceful, pleasant and didn't have any generalized anxiety and I actually got a little jealous
Mike
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Ninjafrodo2
- Posts: 234
- Joined: Sat Oct 19, 2013 11:05 am
Re: Empowering Group Program Run-through Part2
So I just went through the workbook aspect of lesson 2 and I wanted to share my answers with you guys in hopes to see if others could relate and maybe benefit from seeing the list.
I noticed in the 6 steps that would stood out for me is the first step in that you accept that body sensations are a sign that something is bothering you....I like this perception as it is actually more compassionate...its like saying to yourself "hey what's wrong?" the way a parent might to a child or a teacher would to a child that looked upset.
What are you afraid of when having anxiety or panic attacks?
Well I noticed that my list was much longer than I thought. When I answered this, this time it seemed like I had opened up to my own truth instead of just copying and pasting ideas of what it should be like or what the examples said that I related to.
I'm afraid of saying or doing something that is stupid or doesn''t make sense and embarassing myself or getting judged by another person.
I'm afraid of appearing out of control around others and people seeing that and my vulnerability and attacking me for it.
I'm afraid of losing control.
I'm afraid of coming off as if I'm not paying attention to what other people are saying or doing and them calling me out on it or them leaving because they think I don't care.
I'm afraid that something might actually be wrong with me and I'm actually not seeing it.
I'm afraid that I'll show my distress or negative emotions and people will see it and run away from me.
I'm afraid of becoming lethargic and struggling to get through the rest of the day.
What are the symptoms you experience right before an anxiety/panic attack?
Sudden rush of heat in my chest, heart palpitations, Me saying no to whatever the situation or external stressor is
What symptoms do you experience while having an anxiety or panic attack
Racing thoughts, chain reaction of negative downward spiral thoughts, dizziness, spaciness, bewilderment, feeling out of touch with reality, heart palpitations, feeling like i'm being drained, shallow breath, heaviness and tightness in the chest, lightheaded, feeling of doom, feeling of hopelessness.
What do you do when you feel you are going to have an anxiety or panic attack?
Avoid the activity if I can or I endure it while spacing out, I might eat sugar or distract myself with music, tv shows or something else that makes me feel good.
This also jumped out at me in the workbook stuff;
"When you decide to take chances, to practice some of your avoidance behaviors, you will experience feelings of anxiety. It is necessary to have these physical symptoms at this time, they are apart of the challenge" ....Accept, allow and see reality for what it truely is and even expect it to happen.
I also like how they say to use the 6 steps not only for anxiety but any other surge of negative emotion as well and how they gave that example of when you come home to an empty house and start thinking nobody loves me or cares.
And lastly that we all have needs and anxiety can come up when those needs aren't met...it was something I read in a book about being genuine that said something along the same lines, when our basic needs aren't ment then we often feel uncomfortable and upset. Its human nature!
Mike
I noticed in the 6 steps that would stood out for me is the first step in that you accept that body sensations are a sign that something is bothering you....I like this perception as it is actually more compassionate...its like saying to yourself "hey what's wrong?" the way a parent might to a child or a teacher would to a child that looked upset.
What are you afraid of when having anxiety or panic attacks?
Well I noticed that my list was much longer than I thought. When I answered this, this time it seemed like I had opened up to my own truth instead of just copying and pasting ideas of what it should be like or what the examples said that I related to.
I'm afraid of saying or doing something that is stupid or doesn''t make sense and embarassing myself or getting judged by another person.
I'm afraid of appearing out of control around others and people seeing that and my vulnerability and attacking me for it.
I'm afraid of losing control.
I'm afraid of coming off as if I'm not paying attention to what other people are saying or doing and them calling me out on it or them leaving because they think I don't care.
I'm afraid that something might actually be wrong with me and I'm actually not seeing it.
I'm afraid that I'll show my distress or negative emotions and people will see it and run away from me.
I'm afraid of becoming lethargic and struggling to get through the rest of the day.
What are the symptoms you experience right before an anxiety/panic attack?
Sudden rush of heat in my chest, heart palpitations, Me saying no to whatever the situation or external stressor is
What symptoms do you experience while having an anxiety or panic attack
Racing thoughts, chain reaction of negative downward spiral thoughts, dizziness, spaciness, bewilderment, feeling out of touch with reality, heart palpitations, feeling like i'm being drained, shallow breath, heaviness and tightness in the chest, lightheaded, feeling of doom, feeling of hopelessness.
What do you do when you feel you are going to have an anxiety or panic attack?
Avoid the activity if I can or I endure it while spacing out, I might eat sugar or distract myself with music, tv shows or something else that makes me feel good.
This also jumped out at me in the workbook stuff;
"When you decide to take chances, to practice some of your avoidance behaviors, you will experience feelings of anxiety. It is necessary to have these physical symptoms at this time, they are apart of the challenge" ....Accept, allow and see reality for what it truely is and even expect it to happen.
I also like how they say to use the 6 steps not only for anxiety but any other surge of negative emotion as well and how they gave that example of when you come home to an empty house and start thinking nobody loves me or cares.
And lastly that we all have needs and anxiety can come up when those needs aren't met...it was something I read in a book about being genuine that said something along the same lines, when our basic needs aren't ment then we often feel uncomfortable and upset. Its human nature!
Mike
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forever young 06
- Posts: 284
- Joined: Sun Jun 25, 2006 5:19 pm
Re: Empowering Group Program Run-through Part2
hey mike good reading I like you let the physical symptoms throw me. that is what I have been suffering with the worst. I like how we are all being more open and I think showing our feelings.
THH today is a good day to practice what you know so far. I hope all goes well with you.
I went to the Neuro/ phyciatrist yesterday I have started seeing one as I was having severe anxiety trying to get back on the medication and the severe sleep problems I was having. I really have not found out a lot.He suggested two books ( Feeling Good Mood Therapy by Dr George Burns )
Do Not Sweat The Little Things he didn't put who was wrote by. have anyone read these books ?
I hate to keep buying books too.
I have so much stress going on. I have my daughters little dog and he is 14 yrs old and found out he is diabetic. having to take him out to use the potty at least 4 times a day. this is very stressful. now my husband came in and dropped his phone and broke it. I had to get up and find his other phone to have it activated . also you want to hear something funny. I was listening to my relaxtion cd and was laid back in the recliner. suddenly the dog jumped down from the love seat and I jumped like I had been shot. I thought so much for relaxing. my husband runs in and out of the house all day. He is retired and works on the farm and just does different things. I have a lot of distractions. but doing the best I can. I lost my job 2 yrs ago and having to buy health insurance which is very expensive. I am stressing right now over trying to go thru the new health care website and having a hard time getting us set up. I am having a hard time not stressing about this.
okay enough about stressing. I listened to relaxtion tape 2 times yesterday, once this morning. I did read the work book section. they say feel the fear and do it any way. now that is going to be the worst for me to do. I have never really made my self face.
mike most of the symptoms you say you have before and during a panic attack is what I have.Like I started with the physical symptoms then the anxiety so I really thought there was something physically wrong with me. like the chest tightness really sets me off. I am going to accept these as anxiety and hope they pass because next comes the weakness then lightheadedness. here are two websites if they will work of two almost books two different people wrote you may find interesting
www.nothingworks.weebly.com www.agoraphobiacured.com I hope these links work for you as they are a very interesting read.
THH today is a good day to practice what you know so far. I hope all goes well with you.
I went to the Neuro/ phyciatrist yesterday I have started seeing one as I was having severe anxiety trying to get back on the medication and the severe sleep problems I was having. I really have not found out a lot.He suggested two books ( Feeling Good Mood Therapy by Dr George Burns )
Do Not Sweat The Little Things he didn't put who was wrote by. have anyone read these books ?
I hate to keep buying books too.
I have so much stress going on. I have my daughters little dog and he is 14 yrs old and found out he is diabetic. having to take him out to use the potty at least 4 times a day. this is very stressful. now my husband came in and dropped his phone and broke it. I had to get up and find his other phone to have it activated . also you want to hear something funny. I was listening to my relaxtion cd and was laid back in the recliner. suddenly the dog jumped down from the love seat and I jumped like I had been shot. I thought so much for relaxing. my husband runs in and out of the house all day. He is retired and works on the farm and just does different things. I have a lot of distractions. but doing the best I can. I lost my job 2 yrs ago and having to buy health insurance which is very expensive. I am stressing right now over trying to go thru the new health care website and having a hard time getting us set up. I am having a hard time not stressing about this.
okay enough about stressing. I listened to relaxtion tape 2 times yesterday, once this morning. I did read the work book section. they say feel the fear and do it any way. now that is going to be the worst for me to do. I have never really made my self face.
mike most of the symptoms you say you have before and during a panic attack is what I have.Like I started with the physical symptoms then the anxiety so I really thought there was something physically wrong with me. like the chest tightness really sets me off. I am going to accept these as anxiety and hope they pass because next comes the weakness then lightheadedness. here are two websites if they will work of two almost books two different people wrote you may find interesting
www.nothingworks.weebly.com www.agoraphobiacured.com I hope these links work for you as they are a very interesting read.
Re: Empowering Group Program Run-through Part2
Greetings all ~
Well... I made it though today. I was doing very well with staying in the moment, not allowing myself to walk though my day in my mind. Sticking to facts & constantly reminding myself to relax. Drop my shoulders, I tend to tighten there. Relax my legs, ect... It was very hard but I did it! I kept asking myself what I was afraid of? I could not get an answer. That kept me in a good place to just accept the adrenalin and not worry about body symptoms. My cleaning went well, my consult was not as good. I have some issues that I will one day have to address and they are not what I want to do. The good news is I don't have to do anything right away. It is very expensive and I do not have dental insurance. So I have some thinking to do about all this.
Another good thing was after I got there and relaxed I was very good at asking questions, and understanding the answers. I felt my dentist was sincere and caring. He knows I have dental anxiety anyway. So to be continued.
I also know I am in good hands. These specialty dentist have done nothing but help me. They have salvaged my teeth from years of poor dentistry. It is just how long can I afford this, and even if it were free I will have to get really good at dealing with my anxiety.
I did not do any of my lessons today, but had a day full of practice.
Mike,
I think it is true that we are more open this time through. I don't think genuine is the word for me, but better understanding. My first time through I was like a deer in headlights. I didn't understand how this applied to me. I was relieved to find out it was panic attacks. It was awareness that I got from going though several times. Getting to understand how I think instead of just thinking and reacting. That is not easy.
I have done so much better on many levels. But to completely be anxiety free is a stretch of the imagination! We all have different boats but we all have boats.
I also like what you said about not being right back where we started, but maybe doubtful of our ability's. Nice. Your right~ Nicely said!
I also used Coach Chris words today, being in control. If I want to not fear, I can't give up my control to fear.
Forever,
I have not read those books, but have read Joels book, "Your best life now". Probably can get it for $2.00 at a garage sale! Or try Amazon.
Somedays go like that for me as well. We have animals and live on a farm as well. At times someone is always pulling in the drive way or phone rings, We are self employed and work from home. I understand the insurance worries as we are self insured. There are so many stressors out there, retirement coming up, but many I have not been able to fix. That is where letting go and trusting that God is in control. At times that is all I have. Thankfully I have made it this far!
We are working hard at trying to understand this, and getting joy back into our lives.
Well... I made it though today. I was doing very well with staying in the moment, not allowing myself to walk though my day in my mind. Sticking to facts & constantly reminding myself to relax. Drop my shoulders, I tend to tighten there. Relax my legs, ect... It was very hard but I did it! I kept asking myself what I was afraid of? I could not get an answer. That kept me in a good place to just accept the adrenalin and not worry about body symptoms. My cleaning went well, my consult was not as good. I have some issues that I will one day have to address and they are not what I want to do. The good news is I don't have to do anything right away. It is very expensive and I do not have dental insurance. So I have some thinking to do about all this.
Another good thing was after I got there and relaxed I was very good at asking questions, and understanding the answers. I felt my dentist was sincere and caring. He knows I have dental anxiety anyway. So to be continued.
I also know I am in good hands. These specialty dentist have done nothing but help me. They have salvaged my teeth from years of poor dentistry. It is just how long can I afford this, and even if it were free I will have to get really good at dealing with my anxiety.
I did not do any of my lessons today, but had a day full of practice.
Mike,
I think it is true that we are more open this time through. I don't think genuine is the word for me, but better understanding. My first time through I was like a deer in headlights. I didn't understand how this applied to me. I was relieved to find out it was panic attacks. It was awareness that I got from going though several times. Getting to understand how I think instead of just thinking and reacting. That is not easy.
I have done so much better on many levels. But to completely be anxiety free is a stretch of the imagination! We all have different boats but we all have boats.
I also like what you said about not being right back where we started, but maybe doubtful of our ability's. Nice. Your right~ Nicely said!
I also used Coach Chris words today, being in control. If I want to not fear, I can't give up my control to fear.
Forever,
I have not read those books, but have read Joels book, "Your best life now". Probably can get it for $2.00 at a garage sale! Or try Amazon.
Somedays go like that for me as well. We have animals and live on a farm as well. At times someone is always pulling in the drive way or phone rings, We are self employed and work from home. I understand the insurance worries as we are self insured. There are so many stressors out there, retirement coming up, but many I have not been able to fix. That is where letting go and trusting that God is in control. At times that is all I have. Thankfully I have made it this far!
We are working hard at trying to understand this, and getting joy back into our lives.
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forever young 06
- Posts: 284
- Joined: Sun Jun 25, 2006 5:19 pm
Re: Empowering Group Program Run-through Part2
THH even though you didn't get to work on the lessons being in the practice mode was priceless. You did it you learn the most there in the middle of the fear. like Lucinda says feel the fear and do it any way. I am yet to do that most of the things I do don't give me anxiety. I feel if I will keep with this program I shouldn't have to read any more books. I am spending a lot of time with my Bible study and prayer then these lessons, relaxtion tape writing in my journal which I am behind on. I need to do that right now as soon as I post this. I have done my relaxtion tape this morning going to write in my journal, then need to listen to lesson 2 tape. You are right I need to let go and do the best I can. I am trying my hardest to trust God I am in a place where I have to. I would like to go back to work but I need to devote my time to work on getting better at this. I am also close to retirement as I can get social security at age 62. I just need to learn to find things to keep me busy I really wish I could look into volunteer work.
the hardest thing for me will be the feeling the fear and doing it any way. I need to learn the skills which will help with this. I know where my biggest threat is and I need to work on that.
the hardest thing for me will be the feeling the fear and doing it any way. I need to learn the skills which will help with this. I know where my biggest threat is and I need to work on that.
Re: Empowering Group Program Run-through Part2
I woke up and listened to the relaxation tape. It was nice. I am able to think about my visit yesterday and not have fear. I feel clearer minded but I am not going to allow myself to only think about this. I am going forward with my normal day.
I am going to redo my home work, from the past times, and see what changes there maybe. I'll post after I do it.
Forever young,
That is good you have your prayer group. I have been thinking of finding something out where I live. It is hard as living in the rural areas there is not as many things available. I just started to look though.
It is a social event for you, esp. when you don't go to a job. You can meet new people and maybe develop new friendships. I need to do this too.
If it helps, I did have the company of my husband. Do you have someone you trust to do the things you fear? I also would fear the drive in there, and also going to the dentist. So I did not jump out there and do everything I feared. Normally I take Xanax but I just kept it in my pocket. It was good practice. I liked what you said about feeling the fear and doing it anyway. We can do this!!!
I am going to redo my home work, from the past times, and see what changes there maybe. I'll post after I do it.
Forever young,
That is good you have your prayer group. I have been thinking of finding something out where I live. It is hard as living in the rural areas there is not as many things available. I just started to look though.
It is a social event for you, esp. when you don't go to a job. You can meet new people and maybe develop new friendships. I need to do this too.
If it helps, I did have the company of my husband. Do you have someone you trust to do the things you fear? I also would fear the drive in there, and also going to the dentist. So I did not jump out there and do everything I feared. Normally I take Xanax but I just kept it in my pocket. It was good practice. I liked what you said about feeling the fear and doing it anyway. We can do this!!!
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forever young 06
- Posts: 284
- Joined: Sun Jun 25, 2006 5:19 pm
Re: Empowering Group Program Run-through Part2
THH my husband also goes with me when I do go out of my driving zone. I don't fear going to the Dr. or dentist. I think I never really was afraid maybe didn't like it when they would put me in the room and shut the door. I don't like closed rooms with no windows. my biggest problem is going on roads and they don't have to be enterstate but they are one too. roads that are unfamiliar to me I normally don't go down. I know thou other people can over come I can too I just need to believe I can just like they say on the tape I think Carolyn said that. I do now have ha since I started having symptoms with out what I thought was anxiety and they scare me and I think something is wrong with me. but you know that is what we do we start looking at out symptoms and thinking what is wrong with me and that sets off the anxiety.
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Ninjafrodo2
- Posts: 234
- Joined: Sat Oct 19, 2013 11:05 am
Re: Empowering Group Program Run-through Part2
Forever Young:
I'm glad that someone else can relate with me on these physical symptoms, it does really help. I'm with you on that feel the fear and do it any way part being really difficult and yeah mostly because of the body symptoms. In one book I read the author described what it would be like for a non-anxiety sufferer to feel the intensity of anxiety that a constant anxiety sufferer feels. He had said it was like lying on a train track and not getting up while a train is headed your way....thats exactly how it feels like...its really scary and of course it's not going to be easy to do this stuff but it'll definately be worth it...Right now I'm feeling exactly how Ken described..."I'm either going to die or get better but i can't live my life like this anymore."
And I believe that you and all of us can overcome it, it's just going to take a little while in order to fully believe that. I know I don't fully believe it now and you may not fully believe it now but we partially believe it or else we wouldn't still be doing the work and that is a great start...we are starting to face these things right now, we are facing our anxieties right now and we are doing the work despite how scary it is, and that is really amazing!
By the way I have not read that first book but the authur's name is almost the same as another authur in the same field (David, D Burns) and I have read "Don't sweat the small stuff" but it really wasn't very helpful at all...its like saying to worry about what you're worried about and we all know how not effective that is.
I'll check out the websites in a bit and great job with using the relaxation cd by the way.
THH
Great job with the dentistry stuff, it really sounds like you are changing how you respond to the anxiety and really good for doing the relaxation cd and not this stuff really isn't easy and I know that for awhile I didn't really understand things myself (especially the first run through) but I think through practicing the relaxation, we are able to open up to more information and understanding...thats what i've noticed anyways. Although like you said about the first time through...I still feel like a deer in headlights. I don't think being completely anxiety free is realistic but being able to cope with it and release those feelings quickly is more realistic.
Mike
I'm glad that someone else can relate with me on these physical symptoms, it does really help. I'm with you on that feel the fear and do it any way part being really difficult and yeah mostly because of the body symptoms. In one book I read the author described what it would be like for a non-anxiety sufferer to feel the intensity of anxiety that a constant anxiety sufferer feels. He had said it was like lying on a train track and not getting up while a train is headed your way....thats exactly how it feels like...its really scary and of course it's not going to be easy to do this stuff but it'll definately be worth it...Right now I'm feeling exactly how Ken described..."I'm either going to die or get better but i can't live my life like this anymore."
And I believe that you and all of us can overcome it, it's just going to take a little while in order to fully believe that. I know I don't fully believe it now and you may not fully believe it now but we partially believe it or else we wouldn't still be doing the work and that is a great start...we are starting to face these things right now, we are facing our anxieties right now and we are doing the work despite how scary it is, and that is really amazing!
By the way I have not read that first book but the authur's name is almost the same as another authur in the same field (David, D Burns) and I have read "Don't sweat the small stuff" but it really wasn't very helpful at all...its like saying to worry about what you're worried about and we all know how not effective that is.
I'll check out the websites in a bit and great job with using the relaxation cd by the way.
THH
Great job with the dentistry stuff, it really sounds like you are changing how you respond to the anxiety and really good for doing the relaxation cd and not this stuff really isn't easy and I know that for awhile I didn't really understand things myself (especially the first run through) but I think through practicing the relaxation, we are able to open up to more information and understanding...thats what i've noticed anyways. Although like you said about the first time through...I still feel like a deer in headlights. I don't think being completely anxiety free is realistic but being able to cope with it and release those feelings quickly is more realistic.
Mike
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Ninjafrodo2
- Posts: 234
- Joined: Sat Oct 19, 2013 11:05 am
Re: Empowering Group Program Run-through Part2
It's really interesting what I've noticed while going through the program...it seems like life tends to create challenges that actually fit in with the lessons that i'm on each week, it seems rather bizaare at times. It also seems like its not just me this time and that this week has been really anxiety producing for everybody...THH with the dentistry and Forever Young with the dog and with health insurance. I've been triggered soooo much in this last 2 weeks and have been feeling such intense emotions, its been really hard!!!! I do not regret this however!!!
To give you guys an idea...I have supressed my emotions and tried to supress my thoughts for 18 years!! I've been extremely scared of both of those things as I have suffered a great deal in my lifetime and I was too scared to face that reality, it's been really painful and I hadn't really known how to cope and didn't want to fall back into that...That has been my main fear that I've found has kept me anxious and kept me from trying to live in the moment, I've been trying to run away from all that stuff but it does come up when I relax or when i'm not distracting myself with music or movies or anything else...it has made things difficult when it came to following through with the relaxation cd as well but it seems like the only way to do this is to actually feel my way through it...I actually cried a few times the last couple of days and fully felt the time that I've lost because of my trying to run away from the thoughts and feelings....it hurt but it was also cathartic and I do feel somewhat better about it.
I have been doing the relaxation cd at least once a day and I also started to do some walking meditation like it says in the action assignment and even though it is challenging, I am able to enjoy brief moments. I'm able to appreciate the color of the leaves on the trees, the plants, some views of the lake far off in the distance, the feeling of breath going in and out of my mouth as well as my feet as i'm walking, I guess it is a start!
I've been doing this lesson and mostly being in observation mode with the anxiety and emotions and I've really avoided doing the thought replacement that is suggested in lesson 3 but I can really see why it is important to do that....Yes being aware of what is going on with the anxiety and emotions is useful in order to get through them in the moment but i'm finding the written stuff is also important to deal with the patterns and the left over stuff from the situations as it can linger...many of the triggers that I have felt are still lingering and it's still affecting me in a negative way, that is what I mean.
Mike
To give you guys an idea...I have supressed my emotions and tried to supress my thoughts for 18 years!! I've been extremely scared of both of those things as I have suffered a great deal in my lifetime and I was too scared to face that reality, it's been really painful and I hadn't really known how to cope and didn't want to fall back into that...That has been my main fear that I've found has kept me anxious and kept me from trying to live in the moment, I've been trying to run away from all that stuff but it does come up when I relax or when i'm not distracting myself with music or movies or anything else...it has made things difficult when it came to following through with the relaxation cd as well but it seems like the only way to do this is to actually feel my way through it...I actually cried a few times the last couple of days and fully felt the time that I've lost because of my trying to run away from the thoughts and feelings....it hurt but it was also cathartic and I do feel somewhat better about it.
I have been doing the relaxation cd at least once a day and I also started to do some walking meditation like it says in the action assignment and even though it is challenging, I am able to enjoy brief moments. I'm able to appreciate the color of the leaves on the trees, the plants, some views of the lake far off in the distance, the feeling of breath going in and out of my mouth as well as my feet as i'm walking, I guess it is a start!
I've been doing this lesson and mostly being in observation mode with the anxiety and emotions and I've really avoided doing the thought replacement that is suggested in lesson 3 but I can really see why it is important to do that....Yes being aware of what is going on with the anxiety and emotions is useful in order to get through them in the moment but i'm finding the written stuff is also important to deal with the patterns and the left over stuff from the situations as it can linger...many of the triggers that I have felt are still lingering and it's still affecting me in a negative way, that is what I mean.
Mike