morning fear

[pepsilover]

Hi all supporters,
I'm pepsilover (cheryl),
I've had many losses and hughe stressors in y life for 5-6 years, hardly ever a break. I didnt take care of myself.
Iwas so depressed I asked my doc to change my lexapro!!!! Turned out bad idea. I suffered panick and anxiety attacks for 3 months while trying 5 others. So I'm back on Lexapro and I am 10 % better, but still wake up with morning stricken by fear. My passion in life in my granddaughter and this has robbed me these months with her. I'm praying this program helps me be me again, get to enjoy some pepsi and coffee again and be the best grandma ever!!!! Of course find out who I am and a balance in my life. Yet one of my new fears is with her or when she's coming so I'm confused and don't understand it.
Would love to hear your story.
pepsilover

[SoHopeful]

Hi PepsiLover!

I am in my 2nd week of the program as well. I can relate to your anxious feeling in the mornings - after all, I believe it's the time when we feel most alone. For me, when I wake up, all the worries and concerns come flooding back in because my mind is rested & fresh. I have learned that the worst thing that I can do is just lie there. So, I don't any more. I have gotten in the habit of getting up just as soon as I wake up. If I lie there, I start thinking - thinking leads to worry - worry leads to anxiety, etc., etc. It's not always easy but I do it because I know the alternative can get me into trouble.

As far as your grand daughter goes, I think one of the most helpful things I heard on one of the CD's was that our relatives (the ones who are supposed to know us best) typically don't recognize how anxious & depressed we are. We worry that they are judging our behavior when the majority of the time that don't even know that anything is wrong. And, even if they do, as you know, they can't begin to imagine the fear & pain that we feel. I am sure your grand daughter loves & feels very safe w/ you. Once you see her again, you will know that. My son recently helped me through a panic attack while I was driving. I was so embarassed that he had to hear me ranting & raving like a lunatic. However, when I talked to him the next day, he acted like it was no big deal. He even told me that he knows I continued to love him when he threw temper tantrums as a baby (and we laughed). They just don't see so deeply inside of these feelings like we do.

Good luck to you Thanks for your sharing.

[AnxietyMary]

Hello everyone!
This is my first post. I am finishing Session 2. My biggest is the high anxiety and panic attacks BEFORE I go somewhere. Whether to work, the errands, just visiting my daughter, I am literally sick before I get somewhere. After I am there I am OK. Anyone suffer from this?

[danimarie28]

I have that same feeling as soon as i wake up i have a feeling of doom i was never like that i used to love waking up and wondering what i was going to do that day i hope i will get back to that soon!!

[pepsilover]

damamarie,
What has changed to cause you the morning fear feelings.? Mine is that's when I had my most recent panick attacks they happened in my house in the morning so I think I have the fear of reoccurance? But I'm working the program the best I can. The work book is hardest, as reading is hard to concentrate. My environment is so noisy all the time.
Well I meditate, deep breathe in a bag, get a daily list together, go for a walk, a shower and get out of my house. and I'm better. How do you hadle yours?
pepsilover

[SarahBeavers]

I believe I have sufferd from morning fear most of my life. I remember as a child loving to go to bed, this gave me a time away from the stressors when I was awake. However, waking up started the dreaded cycle all over again.
For the past few month I have had episodes were I awake around 2 or 3 in the morning. I know I need to rest to have energy to get through my day, so I force my self to lay there, some times I never really get back to sleep. It just seems to be one continuous circle.


smbeavers

[pepsilover]

damamarie,
how you doing? any better in the mornings? I just started section 3 if you want to read my post on how I cope with my mornings.
pepsilover

[Paisleegreen]

Pepsilover- I'm wondering if you were able to quick drinking caffeine if you would feel better. I can't even have chocolate anymore and never was a coffee or pepsi drinker. I found out in my youth that after drinking a Dr Pepper that I would be depressed the next day as it reved me up so much and I then I would be irritable the next day. As you go through the program, Lucinda talks about eliminating Caffeine from your diet.

So you might think about that as part of your panic attacks or anxious feelings. Paislee

[listen2music4fun]

I agree about the caffeine. I've heard that before (from my MOm). I am sensitive to it (I am petite---5'2" 110/115 lbs) so if I haven't eaten much I feel reaaaallly weird---like shaky and weak. That obviously doesn't help my anxiety at all lol. I just focus on how I feel so I remember eating a lot of bread/pasta, drinking a ton of water and laying down and waiting for it to pass. It sucked =/