Autism
Hello. I was doing well with the program. I went throught the entire program and the end of 2008, and was starting to go back over it again and really nail down a lot of the stuff. I felt I was doing really well. Then, two weeks ago my three year old son was diagnosed with Autism and needless to say, I was devastated. I think a lot of the stuff I learned in the program has helped me deal with this situation a little bit better. However, I completely stopped going through the program because I have now shifted all of my attention to him and learning as much as I can about Autism. I don't want to slip into my old anxious habits again because I know that will not help him either. Has anyone else been through a situation like this?
Hi,
Well, I have an eleven year son with severe autism so I think I may be someone who can relate. After my son's diagnosis with autism, I did not have the skills from this program, and I had a nervous breakdown not soley because of my son's diagnosis, but because of some other things as well so don't be frightened by my sharing that. On a positive note, shortly after my nervous breakdown, I read Lucinda's book "From Panic to Power", and it did help me realize that I had just had a major stressor, that my life was not over, and my main symptom was depersonalization at that time. Sadly, when I went to get help for that, no one knew what it was,but Lucinda's description of "bewilderment" helped me know that I wasn't going crazy.
So, I'm not going to lie and tell you that I didn't have many struggles over the years. It's complicated, but I will tell you that in 2005, I finally bought this program, and that it helped me when no one else did or could. The anxiety is from stress, and then it's also a distraction because it's just so hard to have something happen to your baby. There were also people on this message board that helped me, and I would say that by 2006, I was on my way to recovery.
I want to reach out to you and help you, and I am willing to help you with specific questions. However, what I have noticed from my experiences is that when someone has a young child with autism, it may be hard for them to see me as a source of help because my son is severe, and your child is still so very young with so many more resources available than were available to me. On the plus side, I'm still here:). I've been really horrible with anxiety, and I did get worse than I ever expected at times, but I am better now eventhough my son is severe.
I have also met other parents on here that have children with autism, and this program has been helpful for them.
If you have any specific questions please feel free to private message me:).
Take care,
luvpiggy
Well, I have an eleven year son with severe autism so I think I may be someone who can relate. After my son's diagnosis with autism, I did not have the skills from this program, and I had a nervous breakdown not soley because of my son's diagnosis, but because of some other things as well so don't be frightened by my sharing that. On a positive note, shortly after my nervous breakdown, I read Lucinda's book "From Panic to Power", and it did help me realize that I had just had a major stressor, that my life was not over, and my main symptom was depersonalization at that time. Sadly, when I went to get help for that, no one knew what it was,but Lucinda's description of "bewilderment" helped me know that I wasn't going crazy.
So, I'm not going to lie and tell you that I didn't have many struggles over the years. It's complicated, but I will tell you that in 2005, I finally bought this program, and that it helped me when no one else did or could. The anxiety is from stress, and then it's also a distraction because it's just so hard to have something happen to your baby. There were also people on this message board that helped me, and I would say that by 2006, I was on my way to recovery.
I want to reach out to you and help you, and I am willing to help you with specific questions. However, what I have noticed from my experiences is that when someone has a young child with autism, it may be hard for them to see me as a source of help because my son is severe, and your child is still so very young with so many more resources available than were available to me. On the plus side, I'm still here:). I've been really horrible with anxiety, and I did get worse than I ever expected at times, but I am better now eventhough my son is severe.
I have also met other parents on here that have children with autism, and this program has been helpful for them.
If you have any specific questions please feel free to private message me:).
Take care,
luvpiggy
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My son is also 11 and was diagnosed with autism (Aspergers Syndrome) at the age of 6. I'd already had this program under my belt at that time so I, too, was able to handle it a little better. The truth is, autism is not as devastating as one may think. You are very lucky, MM2009, to get a diagnosis so early. They are having break-thrus all the time in this field and it's been mostly for the younger kids. It seems that they have a great deal of success if they can begin whatever treatment it is as early as possible and age 3 sure qualifies.
A big mistake I made was to put all my energy into my son and never had any me time. I mean totally none! You're gonna crack if you do that. Make sure to put aside some time for you as often as you can and don't forget how to have fun doing whatever you usually have fun doing. Right now for me it's crafty stuff that I do every day. A day without knitting is like a day without sunshine.
I do still suffer from depression from time to time but it's sure not as bad as it could have been. If you suffer from depression, even a little, Claire Weekes' books are a big help in that area. Did you know that something like 80% of moms of children with autism suffer from depression? An astounding number! And it's not the dads that get depression, just the moms because we are the caregivers.
Please give your little angel hugs and smooches from me! He's very lucky to have a mom who takes the time to understand the disorder and gather all the information possible. The more you know, the less you will worry.
You are far more normal in your thinking patterns than you believe. Personally, I think people with autism are far more "normal" than NTs. It's the "normal" people who have to start thinking more like you, not the other way around. And us NTs better hop to it because the numbers of kids diagnosed with autism is rising all the time. Are you under any treatment MrCleveland? I mean for autism specifically, not this program. There have gotta be support groups in your area. Find one and meet with other people who have it too. The best thing you can do is surround yourself with people who understand you.
A big mistake I made was to put all my energy into my son and never had any me time. I mean totally none! You're gonna crack if you do that. Make sure to put aside some time for you as often as you can and don't forget how to have fun doing whatever you usually have fun doing. Right now for me it's crafty stuff that I do every day. A day without knitting is like a day without sunshine.
I do still suffer from depression from time to time but it's sure not as bad as it could have been. If you suffer from depression, even a little, Claire Weekes' books are a big help in that area. Did you know that something like 80% of moms of children with autism suffer from depression? An astounding number! And it's not the dads that get depression, just the moms because we are the caregivers.
Please give your little angel hugs and smooches from me! He's very lucky to have a mom who takes the time to understand the disorder and gather all the information possible. The more you know, the less you will worry.
Oh p'shaw!Originally posted by MrCleveland:
I'm not disabled enough for SSI or anything like that, but I'm not normal to lead a good life.
You are far more normal in your thinking patterns than you believe. Personally, I think people with autism are far more "normal" than NTs. It's the "normal" people who have to start thinking more like you, not the other way around. And us NTs better hop to it because the numbers of kids diagnosed with autism is rising all the time. Are you under any treatment MrCleveland? I mean for autism specifically, not this program. There have gotta be support groups in your area. Find one and meet with other people who have it too. The best thing you can do is surround yourself with people who understand you."Afterall, everybody only hears what he understands." by Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
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MM-We were there. Our situation was a bit different. My daughter had an appt. on 9/29 to see if she had Autism. I crossed off each day and waited, and worried and worried some more while learning all I could. On 9/29 we were told no Austism, BUT....I CRACKED. I did not take care of myself but only focused on her alone. Please, the only way for you to take care of your child is to take care of yourself first, whatever that may be! Whatever it is you enjoy. If you are not healthy, you can not help your child. There are several Early Intervention and School programs to help you and your family. Focus on that. Who can help you to help your daughter. I hope this helps.
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hello..i am in college right now and I am majoring in elementary educ and special education, and i have tons of classes on Autism. One of the biggest struggles that kids with autism face is their parents really not knowing much about it or how to deal with it. I just wanted to say that you seem like you are a wonderful parent. You are learning all that you can, and this will be very beneficial to your son. Dont lose hope..with an early diagnosis in place, there are early interventions in place for students with autism that are very beneficial to them. I know you are probably afraid and upset, but I love working with autistic children, they are unique and very smart. I just wanted to give you some hope and tell you that you seem like you are doing the right thing and heading the right direction for your son!
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Thank you pictbridge. That is great advice. I am trying to focus more on taking caqre of myself. I have a band on the side. I have always loved to play music, but I was contemplating giving it up because I thought that would give me more time with my son. But now I know that having that outlet will be beneficial to me and ultimately beneficial to him. I plan on starting the Stress cd's again next week also. I am little worried about my wife though, because she has never been the type of person to do anything for herself. I just don't know how to make her realize that she has to start doing things for herself, especially now.
Thank you mallory. You sound like you know a lot on the subject. Right now, I am trying to read book after book on the subject and learn as much as possible. We are currently in the process of getting my son into a pre-school program. Until we see how he responds to different therapies, we have no idea where he falls on the spectrum. We do have a lot of faith though, and that helps!
Thank you mallory. You sound like you know a lot on the subject. Right now, I am trying to read book after book on the subject and learn as much as possible. We are currently in the process of getting my son into a pre-school program. Until we see how he responds to different therapies, we have no idea where he falls on the spectrum. We do have a lot of faith though, and that helps!
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Hi MM:
It sounds like you are starting off with a very good perspective on the diagnosis that has been given you about your son.
I just wanted to encourage you a bit if I could.
I am not greatly knowledgable about Autism.
However, I have a nephew with Asbergers Disease.
He is now 35 years old, or will be soon.
He is probably what they call high functioning.
I thought if I told you some of the things that he CAN do that it might encourage you.
He can drive a car. But his Dad has to kind of watch him with it and caution him at times.
LIke when he needs to change lanes, etc.
And he is really good with the computer. Unbelievably good with it. Also he cooks. My brother will supervise him somewhat but he makes their lunch and cleans up the dishes, etc.
So there are many things that your son may learn to do.
And with your knowing now that he has this he will have a better chance and do even better than my nephew.
I just wanted to encourage you. It sounds like you are doing okay with this.
I hope your wife learns to care for herself also.
You area brave and courageous couple.
Wishing you blessings!!
MJ
It sounds like you are starting off with a very good perspective on the diagnosis that has been given you about your son.
I just wanted to encourage you a bit if I could.
I am not greatly knowledgable about Autism.
However, I have a nephew with Asbergers Disease.
He is now 35 years old, or will be soon.
He is probably what they call high functioning.
I thought if I told you some of the things that he CAN do that it might encourage you.
He can drive a car. But his Dad has to kind of watch him with it and caution him at times.
LIke when he needs to change lanes, etc.
And he is really good with the computer. Unbelievably good with it. Also he cooks. My brother will supervise him somewhat but he makes their lunch and cleans up the dishes, etc.
So there are many things that your son may learn to do.
And with your knowing now that he has this he will have a better chance and do even better than my nephew.
I just wanted to encourage you. It sounds like you are doing okay with this.
I hope your wife learns to care for herself also.
You area brave and courageous couple.
Wishing you blessings!!
MJ