Well, I notice my 13 year old little sister likes to shut off and keep me extremely distant. Even with the simplest things.
If I say a funny joke, I see that she wants to laugh but she tries her hardest to not smile or show that she thinks it's funny.
Or if there is a hobby she wants to do (acting, singing, dancing, etc) and she's starting to get classes for it. She'll never mention it to me and tries her best to keep me in the dark about it.
If she has an issue with me, or doesn't like something I say, she doesn't express herself and holds it in causing deep hatred and resentment towards me.
I try to talk about it with her but she's the type that doesn't like confrontation or discussing her feelings AT ALL.
My mother is aware of all this but she says that "she is fine and is going through a growing phase, she's her own person and it's her perogative whether or not she wants to share with you these things, she doesn't have a problem - you're the one that does and you need to get over it, and no you cannot come to her with your concerns because she has to find her own path."
*sigh*
Even living within the same roof as both them is getting quite difficult. I have concerns for my sister and how she'll respond/react to people in the future when there is an issue - Can she really handle it?
and I'm concerned about how OUR personal sister to sister relationship will be if this continues.
She knows I love her, she knows I care and look out for her. She knows I want us to be close and have a good friendship. And she knows I am aware of the constant fakeness. Either way she prides herself on "faking us out."
It really is affecting me having to "act" like it doesn't bother me and not say anything. It honestly hurts my heart for my sister to want to push me out of even the simplest things in her life.
Is this just a "normal growing phase" and my stress and worry should not be concerned.
Or is there something more?
What should I do?
Disconnect with little sister.
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Guest
How old are you?
The best thing you can do is be there for her.
You don't know what's going on with her. She can be going through something that nobody understands.
If you would just be with her, be a listener, spend time with her, she will eventually open up to you, once she trusts you.
If you are too demanding, or you talk too much or not a good listener, yes she will shut down as many people do.
If you are really set on finding out what is up with her, don't hesitate to be open and honest. Tell her it hurts your feelings when she acts a certain way and you are confused about that. Then allow her to express herself.
The best thing you can do is be there for her.
You don't know what's going on with her. She can be going through something that nobody understands.
If you would just be with her, be a listener, spend time with her, she will eventually open up to you, once she trusts you.
If you are too demanding, or you talk too much or not a good listener, yes she will shut down as many people do.
If you are really set on finding out what is up with her, don't hesitate to be open and honest. Tell her it hurts your feelings when she acts a certain way and you are confused about that. Then allow her to express herself.