Using my kids

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Iwillbebetter
Posts: 484
Joined: Sun Nov 27, 2011 8:35 am
Location: Minnesota

Re: Using my kids

Post by Iwillbebetter » Fri Dec 16, 2011 1:20 pm

I'm sorry to hear that you've already tried with no response!! Yes you are right, now it's time to realize accept, first and foremost YOU did NOTHING wrong!!! You made all attempts possible, don't let him punish you anymore, let him be the only one to be punished by this. I can't imagine it's not affecting him in somehow. He may not realize it yet, but sooner or later it will hit him like a ton of brick!!

Yes I think you've got it I'm sure the graduation is bringing on more anxiety. Like you said she'll be moving on. As hard as it is, try to see it more as excitement. She did it, she made it (for kids today that's not always so easy) She'll be able to make her start with solid ground. With every ending comes a new beginning. Be proud. Change can be hard, but it can be good also!!

I remind myself of that OFTEN. Past is gone, Who knows what lies tomorrow, all we have is NOW!!!! I to have trouble with the notebook thing. I saw from a post though that it's more about being able to find the negative statements and learning to counter act them. So although as I can't just walk around and write EVERY thought down. When I have a few minutes here and there I will write a few I recall. If I didn't have time during the day, I will write the ones I remember at the end of the day. Just learning to recognize them, and counter them or defuse/debunk them....

Funny I had that same lightbulb moment just last night. Deep down I am still like that child. Wanting someone to accept me and tell me I'm ok. Etc... It's really time for us to start "nurturing that child and helping them to grow and flurish!!"

I will let you know how things go. I'm sure they will be fine. Of course I have spent a little bit of the day thinking of how to get out of it. Instead of feeding it or dwelling I kept busy. Cleaned out the closet upstairs!! Been wanting to do that for a long time now anyway, just never could pull out the motivation to do it. That's something else I've noticed, how much more I can do. I don't wake up and just want to sit around all day. I actually want to do things.

Hope your day is well also. Talk to you later :)
"Only rainbows after rain, the sun will always come again, and it's a cirlce, circling around again it comes around again...."

Iwillbebetter
Posts: 484
Joined: Sun Nov 27, 2011 8:35 am
Location: Minnesota

Re: Using my kids

Post by Iwillbebetter » Fri Dec 16, 2011 11:29 pm

So I made it. I did pretty good staying busy so I didn't spend to much time trying to think of a "way out" I also reminded myself that I am going to her house, so if anything I can leave if/when I need. But we had a great time. I don't really know her well I met her at church, which we recently started going, so it was nice to chat and get to know eachother. She seems like a nice woman and I am looking forward to the next time. The kids also enjoyed themselves VERY much. They got along very well with her kids so that was a bonus. :) We stayed for about 2 hours. I was starting to feel ready after about an hour, but made it two. It was very nice. I did have a little anxieties on the way there, wanted to turn around once or twice....
I'm VERY glad I went instead of "sitting on the sidelines"
"Only rainbows after rain, the sun will always come again, and it's a cirlce, circling around again it comes around again...."

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