Please help!!!

Candiandricky · Post by **Candiandricky** » Tue Mar 11, 2008 9:59 am

I know that I wrote something similiar like this yesterday but the feelings and thoughts have gotten worse...

Ok, so about 6 years ago I had feelings that I might be falling out of love with my husband

. Where those feelings came from I don't know, but they eventually went away.

We had tried to have a baby for 3 years and finally out of the blue we got pregnant. I am so scared because I don't feel that connection with my unborn baby and I am starting to question myself of Is this really what I want? Am I going to be a good mother? Etc.

The part that scares me the most is that when I first got pregnant I was feeling the feelings that I would die for my baby and I don't feel those feelings anymore. I am so scared about this.. Please help....

derfy · Post by **derfy** » Tue Mar 11, 2008 1:26 pm

It is ok trust me. I have those feelings from time to time and I am 30 weeks pregnant. It is perfectly normal to have all sorts of feelings when you are pregnant whether this is your first baby or not. This is my husband and I's first baby and trust when i tell you, I have had every thought possible. If you don't feel comfortable talk to your doctor and see what they think. They will give you alot better advice. Good luck and if you need to talk feel free.

Amy

PS i am sure you will be a wonderful mommy~!!!!!!!

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Tue Mar 11, 2008 1:32 pm

Ricky,
Dont beat yourself up about this! I had two children. I didnt feel bound to mine when i was carrying them either.. OH sure at first,, i was happy, etc, the family was excited,, but then you have to carry it for NINE months.You go through lots of hormone changes,, no energy, you grow OUT of your clothes. You eat everything in site, and then you get to where you can even see your own toes, when you look down cause your stomach is so big.lol
So, your NOT abnormal,, but trust me, when your baby is born,,, you hold it in your arms for the first time,, and realize this child is part of the two of you, and is Gift,, you will bond with your baby!!!
The nine months before is WORK! Please relax, Be good to Yourself, cause by being good to yourself , you carrying a healthier baby!!! Congrats by the Way!!!! Nelly:)

EileenV · Post by **EileenV** » Wed Mar 12, 2008 2:02 am

Mello Nello,
Thanks, I just get thoughts of not feeling close to my baby and it scares the hell out of me. I have thought about what if I don't change and my husband leaves me for it. It all just scares me. I get these thoughts all the time and I don't know if I am doing my coping skills right because I am having a very very very hard time just letting go and accepting the thoughts and not being scared of the feelings. It is a very scary thing...

Any advice??

Candi

spedteacher · Post by **spedteacher** » Wed Mar 12, 2008 6:05 am

candi,
Remember these are just thoughts! You wont do the thoughts, they just come around to pester you! Happens to all of us! And of course since this is your first child, we have all had those feelings,, your VERY normal!!